Puzzling Philosophical Question, Plus Girlfriend Drama (Real or Imagined, You Decide)

[whitedragon]

I was having a mild conversation in the chatbox today, and another poster posed this profound dilemma.

"Are cats omniscient, or merely underfoot?"

I really like cats, and I like LolCats, and I feel like each one is trying to tell me something. What do you all think?

Also, there's this girl that I really like but she totally ignores me accept whenever I call and she's totally mean to me all the time except whenever we're hanging out together, and she only likes to do things that I don't like, except when I like them too.

Oh, she also is a total slob except whenever she cleans up and she totally accuses me of being a slob (I think I am, but how dare she say it!!?!??!) except when she doesn't.

I totally like this girl I think but she's totally mean to me except like when she isnt, which is all the time, and it's really bugging me and I don't know what to do. How can I get her to like me?

Advice?

Should I totally like ask her to marry me, you think she'll like me then?

[j2k4]

Sounds like the girl of your dreams/nightmares.

I think you should ignore her/kneel before her in total submission.

I hope this solves your dilemma.

I like cats, too - I have four of them, but none of mine are omniscient, and only one of them is underfoot.

[j2k4]

After re-reviewing your quandary, you're sounding like a bit of a weinie.

Real women like bratwurst and other large sausages.

[AdamVR4]

Surprise butt sex should do the trick.

[whitedragon]

Continuing the story. The other day, we watched my favorite movie, "Varsity Blues". She told me she doesn't understand why I like it so much! What should I do? This has been cause for much emo introspection on my part.

[AgentOblivious]

Sorry couldn't resist...

If you two can still get along despite everything she does then don't worry about it too much...I'd say its worse when all you get out of her is "oh nothing" and "its fine"...but what do I know?

[Zaroth]

Ask her out.

Worst case scenario she says no and you're in the same position as before(minus a "hangout buddy").

Best case scenario you have a girlfriend thats rude, doesn't want to hangout with you and you have nothing in common with.


BTW, how old is this girl?

[j2k4]

...there's this girl that I really like but she totally ignores me accept whenever I call and she's totally mean to me all the time except whenever we're hanging out together, and she only likes to do things that I don't like, except when I like them too.

Oh, she also is a total slob except whenever she cleans up and she totally accuses me of being a slob (I think I am, but how dare she say it!!?!??!) except when she doesn't.

I totally like this girl I think but she's totally mean to me except like when she isnt, which is all the time, and it's really bugging me and I don't know what to do. How can I get her to like me?

Advice?

Should I totally like ask her to marry me, you think she'll like me then?

Surprise butt sex should do the trick.

Just so.

Continuing the story. The other day, we watched my favorite movie, "Varsity Blues". She told me she doesn't understand why I like it so much! What should I do? This has been cause for much emo introspection on my part.

My God, man how many times do you need to be told?

Don't forget the Sausage Major.

[bluefox1081]

Slap her...women love to get beat. They say they don't, and she might break up with you, but it'll only be temporary. She'll probably come back to you crying within a few days, professing her love for you.

[j2k4]

Slap her...women love to get beat. They say they don't, and she might break up with you, but it'll only be temporary. She'll probably come back to you crying within a few days, professing her love for you.

Do you mean to say that a dry sausage major in the brown eye won't cause enough discomfort?

Ah, whatever...she'll never leave you now, anyway.

You are so screwed.