whats your best "I got pulled over and..." cop stories

[Valhallaz]

I have plenty of cop stories, but one comes to mind...

I used to deliver newspapers for the Daily Times. I used a little mazda protégé, purely stock, with a yellow strobe on top so some idiot didn't plow into me.
So one night, I'm early in the route, with maybe 400 papers left to deliver. One of Alcoa's finest pulls onto the road behind me, follows me and watches while I hit 20, maybe 30 paper tubes, leaving a paper in each. Finally turns on his lights, and pulls me over. Walks to my window, and on the way. shines his light in the back which is full of brand new newspapers in bundles of 50.... First words out of his mouth are "Son... Are you stealing newspapers?"

Left me speechless...

[dbest671]

This is Don... April and I were going through the local town in route to Walmart when I see the Blue lights behind me. The local police officer looks like he is straight out of a Mayberry TV show as he approaches the car. I rolled down the window and put both hands out and announce that I am armed and have a gun. His response " that's OK so do I". Got a warning ticket for missing a Stop sign.

[j2k4]

This is Don... April and I were going through the local town in route to Walmart...

Holy shit, Don - that makes three of us who patronize Walmart.

Yeah, I have so many cop stories - too many to pick from.

[stealthee]

This is Don... April and I were going through the local town in route to Walmart when I see the Blue lights behind me. The local police officer looks like he is straight out of a Mayberry TV show as he approaches the car. I rolled down the window and put both hands out and announce that I am armed and have a gun. His response " that's OK so do I". Got a warning ticket for missing a Stop sign.

Best story yet.

As for me, I have been pulled over close to 20 times. None in the recent past though. Got a lot of reductions right on the spot. Only dealt with one real dickhead and that was back in my younger days. That cop is no longer a cop, because he ended up fucking with the wrong person.

Best story I can remember right now happened about 5 1/2 years ago in the Stealth. I had to make a run to Charlotte for work. Customer needed this conveyor belt bad. There was a problem with production and it didn't get done until too late to make UPS. It had to be there by 9:00 am and I got the honors. I got a few hours sleep and left home at 3:00 am. Drove hard the whole way there and had no issues. Pulled in at 8:50.

Turned around to head home. Stopped for gas and food and put the pedal to the metal. Was doing 70 (in a 60) and the speed dropped to 50 and I didn't. I blew past a cop and got lit up. Now mind you I have a hat on and its flipped backwards, and for driving comfort I am wearing basketball shorts and a beater, so that meant you could see my tattoos. Cop comes up, gets my info, asks the normal, where am I going and where am I coming from. I was too tired so I was just honest. He walked back to his car, then 5 minutes later was getting out. I looked at my cousin, who went with me to help keep me awake, and said, "We might be getting searched."

Cop came up and asked "What kind of car is this?"

I responded with "A Dodge Stealth?"

He answered, "Oh, because I was looking at you registration and was confused, because I look at it and keep seeing a 3000GT."

He went back to his car, came back a few minutes later and said, "I am going to write you up for 60 in a 50 since you were so cooperative, and hsince you have such an awesome car. Also, I know you are going to take off again once you get away from me, so I will just warn you to watch it when you hit Summersville. They are really hardcore on nailing speeders."

Two hours later, I was just so exhausted and in a daze from driving almost 12 hours straight. I was literally less than one mile from my exit when I realize my cousin is yelling, "COP! COP!" Too late. Got lit up again.

Cop came up to my window, told me he got me doing 93 in a 70. He got my info, asked the usual questions. Came back a few minutes later and was asking more questions. I glanced at my cousin and we both knew what was coming. He asked if he could search the car and I allowed him. There was nothing to hide.

He got us out of the car, patted us both down. Found a knife in my cousin's pocket. It was just a pocket knife he carried everywhere and the cop acted like he didn't even care about it. We stood at the back of my car while he searched my car. The whole time he was searching it he was commenting on how nice it was. After a brief search he wrote me a ticket for a 73 in a 70.

I spent more money than I made that day.

[HilbillyHomeboy]

There's so many...(though I haven't been pulled over in about 12 years)

Was sitting at a stop light, I was the 1st car at the light. In the middle of the red light...I, just, go. I get hardly anywhere and here comes the blues from the oncoming lane, whipping it around. I know what's up, so I just go ahead and pull over and wait for him...

Cop - Know why I pulled you over, son?
Me - Yep, took off in the middle of that red light
Cop - WHY?
Me - Dunno. My friend here was challenging me to name off cars by their headlights. So, I said, Grand Am, S-10, Accord, Cop...
Cop - Wait, what? You KNEW I was sitting right across from you?
Me - Yes sir.
Cop - So why did...what compelled you...Jesus Christ, kid, just get the hell out of here, and try to pay attention?

He was shaking his head and laughing as he was walking back to his cruiser. Probably wouldn't have been so funny if he knew I had an open beer sitting in between my legs during the whole conversation.

Jeremy

[Rom3BreaK]

I was driving from Southern CT to Rochester, NY up 17 with my girlfriend. Speed limit in this area is 65. If anyone's ever made the drive up 17 you know how much of a windy highway with lots of drastic inclines and declines it is. I was almost to Binghamton, just a few exits away from mine and I see these dim glowing red lights headed up the on ramp in my side mirror, they looked like brake lights at night with the brakes not applied. I'm keeping my eye on the dim red lights thinking WTF to myself. My girlfriend had been telling me a story and realized I wasn't paying attention, and starts yelling at me. By this time I realized that it might be a cop he was quickly closing on me, and finally turned the headlights on, then of course the red and blues. Mind you this was taking place on one of those drastic declines, it's late Friday night after work and I'm already sick of driving - so I'm knowingly doing over the speed limit.

Now she understands why I wasn't listening, and starts yelling at me for driving too fast as I pull over.

Eventually the cop makes his way up to the car and asks the usual "Do you know how fast you were going?", I reply "No" and he responds with "Well, first I clocked you doing 81, then I got you doing 84 as you got further down the hill". I responded sheepishly with "sorry", and he proceeded to tell me I didn't need to apologize to him, but I did need to slow down. He asked what the hurry was and where I was going to - I was headed to the girlfriends family's house in Rochester for the 4th of July weekend and that there was no real hurry, just that it's a long ride and I was just kind of "going". Of course I was all "yes sir" and "no sir" while consciously keeping my hands in sight, on the wheel. I gave him all my info and he went back to his car. Girlfriend continued to yell at me for driving to fast.

This was only my second time getting pulled over. Eventually he returns from his car and informs me that I had given him an expired insurance card - I never really bother removing the old ones, I just toss the new ones in the envelope within my glove box and carry on. Of course at this point I have a mini panic attack that perhaps I somehow don't have the current card in there; but after going through my collection, finally discover the up to date card at the bottom of the stack. He took a look at it and handed back my information, asking "have you ever been pulled over in NY state before?"... I hadn't. He proceeded to tell me that he's aware it's a long haul from CT up to Rochester but I needed to slow down for the duration of the ride, and that he was holding my girlfriend responsible, and didn't want to hear that I got pulled over again 5 miles up the road. She of course agrees and he tells me that because I've been so cooperative, he was going to let me off with a verbal warning and to be careful pulling out. I replied "will do, I certainly appreciate it". I was ecstatic as I know that would have been a healthy ticket (and my first). I pulled out and continued on slowly (speed limit) up the road, girlfriend feeling like the new God.

I finally see my exit to switch highways to continue on to Syracuse about 5 minutes later, and I see this cop car come flying up from behind me. He brakes along side of me in the fast lane with me on the right, slowing to my speed. He waves, brakes, and gets off the exit just prior to mine. I guess he wasn't kidding about me getting pulled over 5 miles up the road - he would have been the one to do it!

I really got off the hook on that one, especially since I know I had been going faster at certain points during the ride. I of course slowed down the rest of that trip. I think that was 3 years ago, still no tickets to date! Things I learned: Cops may not necessarily use headlights while driving. Throw out your old insurance cards. Be straight forward and cooperative, and pray to God the officer who pulled you over is feeling lenient. I think part of the reason he let me off was that I didn't give him some b.s. excuse for why I was driving so fast.

-Caleb