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Ah, here is a clue that you are onto something, Tret.Quote:
Originally Posted by terrets
Sometimes a parent feels driven to fight fire (stupid) with fire (stupid).
As someone else has said, it is the technique of demonstrating absurdity by being absurd.
WHen I'm looking for advice on doing something on my car, I turn to those with more experience than I, not less. How is parenting different?
Those of you who have not been in the position of raising a rebellious (in my case, they went WAY the hell beyond rebellious) child are of course entitled to your opinions, but I assure you, in your wildest imaginings, you can't grasp what raising my little nightmares involved. Maybe that's because I didn't have the foresight to take video... I was otherwise occupied.
God willing, none of you will have to deal with how you'd react when one of them trades YOUR laptop or jewlrey for a couple joints, or a line of coke. Or catching him or her in the basement, crushing the neighbor's cat's paw in your workbench vise for the fun of it. Or burning down your garage while playing with a propane torch. Or at 13, stealing your wife's car and wrapping it around a tree. I could go on here for hours...
Or my proudest day, when Ryan, at 16, calmly announced that he'd just cut the rest of our throats while we sleep, then burn the house down... I believed him, and with good reason. Yes, I GAVE UP on him. I abondoned my responsibility and had social services remove him from my home within the hour. WHich of you is qualified to second guess me on that one?
I learned a lot of lessons in taking in the 8 and 10 year old children of my ex's junkie sister, but to this day, I still haven't figured out how I could have better handled them. Some of you would say I failed as a parent, and maybe you'd be right. But then, maybe you know jack shit about it, and never will. I personally would guess the latter is more likely.
Bashing of this guy's parenting skills means little from someone who hasn't been there. The guy in this video will hear no criticism from me.
I'll quote, cuz Alan's contraption won't let me thank you for that.Quote:
Originally Posted by Valhallaz
My oldest step-son's departure from the nest coincided with the disappearance of the cream of my collected collectables - the top (easily portable) 5% of my stuff, worth about 30K.
Bought his way out to Denver to be near a buddy and set himself up.
He's in prison now - 35, and he'll be getting out in about 30 years...if he doesn't fuck that up, too.
only a bleeding heart liberal would believe that every kind can "be saved". just because you're the worlds greatest parent doesn't mean your kid won't be a fuck-up. and just because you baby the shit out of your car & treat it like gold, doesn't mean that it won't be totaled by an illegal driver.
i haven't the foggiest why some people feel that all variables are within personal control.
I don't think you failed as a parent at all. You weren't the parent. Their parents already shirked their responsibility and as such, their children developed how they did. It sounds to me like you had a pretty impressive amount of control to last as long as you did.Quote:
Originally Posted by Valhallaz
I agree. Unless you manage to raise your kid in some kind of controlled bubble test environment, it's always kind of a roll of the dice.Quote:
Originally Posted by IPD
True, but inaccurate.Quote:
Originally Posted by Zaroth
Step-parents or people in Glenn's situation have all of the accoutrements of parenting with about 10% of the authority, and even that is only a fact of age.
When I was growing up, rare was the time my family didn't host or otherwise sponsor anywhere from 2-8 of my cousins, due to death or divorce.
My parents became everyone's parents, legally and/or otherwise.
Extremely disturbing.Quote:
Originally Posted by Valhallaz
Ryan was a snake, with no respect for life, human or otherwise. He came by it honest, I never blamed him for what he'd become. I only held him accountable for the choices he made going forward.
He is currently serving time in Montana for what happened at the tail end of a 7 state string of armed robberies. I suspect he will never get out. When Montana is finished with him, he still faces charges in other states. ANd each time he seems to be nearing his term, he finds a way to extend it. The last was assaulting a guard.
I will regret to my grave not being able to get through to him. Or his sister.
But it wasn't for lack of trying.
First of all you never stop parenting your childern no matter how old they are.
The boundaries change but you should always be there for guidence.
I can understand the Dads anger but I don't beleive I would post it all over the internet.
The face book account would have been deleted and the laptop would have been taken away for a period of time.